Oh it's a watery one alright!
Yep, it’s a watery full moon this one coming in Cancer on Friday. Us Cancerians are the ones with the hard shell and the soft inside and we feel it and we’re really feeling it, but we’re not the only ones feeling it. It is an intensely emotional full moon bringing up some very old patterns from childhood around abandonment and rejection and the resulting feelings of being unlovable and not worthy of receiving love, leading to feelings of insecurity and fear around being unsafe.
This moon is definitely trying to crack us open, deep into the heart and root chakras, asking us to look at our sense of belonging and value and the many ways we give ourselves away to others because we feel that their needs are more important than our own and because we might fear confrontation and the emotional instability of others, so we do what we can to keep the peace, bearing the burden ourselves…caring too much about everyone else and not even recognising our own needs, let alone attending to them and meeting them.
Expect to be triggered. Notice the patterns. The same things that happen but might not have happened for years ago now, but are coming up again for you to look at in more depth and to clear another layer. Or maybe they keep happening.
It might trigger feelings of loneliness - notice what you do to counter this feeling, the fear of loneliness and spending your life alone.
It might trigger feelings of deep unease, of things not being how you want them to be and the distress this causes realising that you have no control and feeling unsafe - try and notice what you do to counter this - do you let the mind go wild with its imaginings or do you sit with it and surrender into it.
If you’ve a tendency towards sensitivity and people pleasing, and loathe conflict, then you may have a habit of taking everything far too personally. Watch that and look more closely at your boundaries and sense of self. Where do you end and someone else begins? Can you say no? If not, why not? How many times in your life do you do things you don’t want to do, simply because you struggle to voice those two letters, NO?!
Much like any dark night of the soul, the more you can surrender to it, the quicker it passes. So be with it, the emotional pain, the uncomfortableness, the tears, the utter despair. It passes. It is just some old stuff coming up. There is no need to give meaning to it and yet notice how the mind tries to do this, to make meaning out of something that cannot be truly known, that is old and now needs to go. To make meaning out of it, traps it and stops it moving through you. So surrender and try not to let the mind let go…relax your arms, your elbows and your hands.
Remember, more often than not, whoever has triggered you is not at fault. You may blame them. But it’s really not going to help things. This is an opportunity for you to take responsibility. They’ll likely have no idea that they’ve triggered you, it wasn’t intentional. Admittedly, they may not have behaved well but thank them for playing their role in the bigger picture, of helping you to heal and release a layer of unnecessary protection and defence that lays heavily and prevents you softening and feeling a deeper level of compassion and trust.
And really that’s where this moon is taking us…to soften that hard shell and lean into the softness of compassion for self and for others, to trust. It’s a moon which highlights our sensitivities and asks us to honour these, own them and allow for them. As Gabor Mate points out in his recent book, The Myth of Normal, ‘normal’ is indeed a myth. Embrace your differences and befriend them. Society is screwed, not you. Forget trying to fit not a notion of ‘normal’ in a screwed society as you’ll only end up harming yourself more than you’ve been harmed already.
So be gentle. Sit with it. Let the water flow, releasing emotions that have long been held, place a healing hand on your heart and feel your feet on the earth. Know that you are safe and loved and have every right to be here, you belong on planet earth with your sensitivities and differences and you have absolutely nothing to prove. You are wonderful just as you are. Cherish you, be compassionate, love, and remember that you are a beautiful soul having a human experience, that’s all.
Happy full moon!
Love Emma x
